by Noise Pollution

I wonder if I’m just pretending
I’m just numbing the pain
Of a wound that will one day open up
And rip blood from my veins
Am I stitching up a cut
Without cleaning the wound
Am I not enough
Or will I not be enough soon?
I’m waiting for the day
I’ll have something to prove
But that isn’t now
And it sure as hell isn’t you
You can’t cure my disease
That’s something I’ve always known
You are only the thread
Of this cut that I’ve sown
I once swore that I’d be
But now I don’t think I can
You are not my belief, you are not my revenge
You are not my romance
They all said it would come
But it never came
They said when I grew up
That everything left would change
But I’m still fucked up
Yeah, I’m still the same
Only washed off the blood
Never bleached-white the stain
So maybe this is it
This is how things will be
In spite of my wants
In spite of my needs
I’ve got so much to lose
But so much still to gain
When I lose it all
Will I at least have someone else to blame?